First of all, thanks for all the birthday wishes. I don’t usually celebrate my birthday, so it was both overwhelming and flattering to receive so much attention for simply having made it through another year. It’s been an adventure; I moved from a small, rural New England town to a bustling desert metropolis halfway across the country.
I’m going on hiatus,
Specifically, I’m trying to break away from the pressure to commodify my work. It's become increasingly apparent that I need a mental reset and, quite frankly, I'm surprised that I've lasted this long without doing anything outright crazy. Money has been a constant stressor; it's most of the reason why I've been maniacally darting back-and-forth between projects. I've never had enough financial security to relax, - and listen, I'm not being melodramatic here - I've been flying below the poverty line for years; food (to prevent my impending starvation) and rent have hitherto been a very real concern for me.
I’m finally able to find clients, but it’s difficult for me to handle them. I’m hopelessly recalcitrant. I’ve tried (with some success) to master my ego; I’ve grown up a bit. I’m more reserved and sophisticated with my opinions than I used to be, but the underlying problems still exist. I’m childish; I want to do things I've deemed worthwhile. It’s that simple, and working on someone else's project rarely fulfills that requisite.
I’ve gotten myself a nearby part-time job. I’m going to work and save and slowly chip away at personal projects until something sticks; without the stress of impending starvation breathing down my neck.
I’ve set up a Patreon for those of you who're willing to support my nebulous ambitions while they're yet so vague.